As we enter 2025, many people are focused on setting New Year’s resolutions with goals about what they would like to change and improve about themselves. But when you live with ADHD, you already receive plenty of feedback about what you could do differently or better. All too often, you set goals for yourself that are unreachable or tedious and then you feel bad about not following through with them. This process defeats the positive change and different attitude you are looking for in the new year. Instead, I’d like to offer you another choice.
THE WARM GLOW EFFECT
When you’re navigating life with ADHD, it can feel like the days are packed with 
challenges: forgetfulness, overwhelm, difficulty focusing, and emotional ups and downs. All too often, there’s more stress than calm and more frustration than relaxation. How can you lower stress, increase happiness and improve your overall well-being? The answer may surprise you.
Research has found that helping others reduces stress and improves longevity while also producing what’s known as the warm glow effect. This effect occurs when you give of yourself in a way that improves conditions of the larger world, without expecting anything in return. It’s like altruism but less specifically aimed at volunteerism or donations.
Beyond “getting that glow”, generosity towards others has also been found to improve psychological health and well-being . When we give to others (or when we volunteer for a cause), we aim to improve the lives of others. Yet, these acts also improve your sense of well being.
Microgiving–small acts of intentional kindness–is one way of igniting that glow.
WHAT IS “MICROGIVING”?
Microgiving refers to the small, everyday acts of generosity and kindness you can engage in without much effort or planning. These are things like:
- Holding the door open for someone
- Sending a quick text to check on a friend
- Give a genuine compliment
- Offering a smile to a stranger
- Express gratitude
- Donate small amounts to charities
These actions don’t need to be elaborate. The magic is in their simplicity—and
their ability to connect you to others. It’s this connection that allows you to feel good about yourself and build your self-worth. You are just being the best version of yourself–the part that is kind, loving and thoughtful. The part that doesn’t get enough air time when you are rushing to meet deadlines or pick the kids up from school and criticizing yourself along the way..
The best part about focusing on microgiving in the New Year means that you don’t have to set unrealistic exercise goals, establish new work routines or give up chocolate (of course you can do these things if you want – but I don’t want to see you disappointed in yourself for not following through or measuring up!). Instead, you are making small, positive connections with people you encounter to spread some good vibes in the world. That’s it.
A SMALL ACT WITH BIG IMPACT
Microgiving increases your sense of purpose and reduces isolation. It can offer you a fast anchor when things seem chaotic because you are connecting with another person and sensing your common humanity. Dr. Kristin Neff emphasizes that this is a key component of self-compassion. Microgiving also boosts your mood and your social skills. Acts of kindness light up the brain’s reward systems, releasing dopamine and serotonin that counteract frustration or boredom. These short interactions also foster meaningful social connections with minimal pressure, improving social skills without draining energy. A quick smile or brief greeting turns down loneliness and fosters a sense of community and belonging.
5 WAYS TO USE MICROGIVING
Here are five easy steps to incorporate acts of microgiving into your routine:
- Start Small: Choose one simple thing to try per week. It might be texting a friend or family member to say you’re thinking of them. It might be deciding to open the door for another person at a store or the post office. Or it might be remembering to thank somebody for a nice action they do for you. The goal is to repeat this behavior throughout the week.
- Set Reminders: If remembering to perform acts of kindness feels hard to do for your ADHD brain, that’s fine. Set notifications, alarms or visual cues to remind yourself. Maybe put a Post-It on your computer or your bathroom mirror to remind you to give a compliment or share a supportive thought. Cues remind you and keep you on track.
- Create Routines to Keep It Going: Routines build habits which is why consistency matters. Link your act of microkindness to an existing habit. For example, when picking up your daily coffee, thank the server and give a smile. When brushing your teeth, think of a person who might need a text of encouragement or a ‘hello’. When you pair things together, it increases the likelihood that you will remember them. I call one of my elderly parents when I drive to pick up my dog at the end of my day. Initially, I set an alarm but now I just do it automatically.
- Forget about perfection: Microgiving isn’t about perfection. It’s about being present and noticing small opportunities to connect. Many people with ADHD struggle with social anxiety. Microgiving turns the worry about social interactions by shrinking the size of them. You are not engaging in long conversations but rather making brief contact that is warm and friendly.
- Celebrate the Wins: After completing an act of kindness, take a moment to acknowledge how it makes you feel. Did you smile? Did someone else smile back? Did you feel a small wave of relief or connection? Taking time to recognize these moments reinforces their benefits.
By focusing on small acts of generosity, you are giving yourself the gift of connection, joy, and perspective. ADHD can lead to isolation, judgment and anxiety. Microgiving reminds you that you’re part of a community. Even when you’re feeling overwhelmed, a tiny, intentional act can shift your mental state, ease stress, and help you feel empowered. So think about what you would like to do and set your alarms to remind you about microgiving. What a great way to welcome 2025!
