Do you see a pile of unfolded laundry, turn around, and run away? Are you feeling like your get-up-and-go took off and left for Bermuda? If so, you share something in common with many other adults with ADHD: avoiding unpleasant activities that lack interest. That is, until you can’t put them off any more. Sometimes you just don’t feel like doing the ‘have-to’ thing. You’re tired; the task seems insurmountable; it’s boring to stop what’s fun. Whatever the reasons are, many people right now are feeling resilience fatigue and struggling with productivity. Here are my organizing tips for ADHD adults who are ready to pick themselves up and pivot to more productivity.
Shifting your perspective to give yourself a chance
While procrastination can be debilitating, the negative self-talk about your lack of motivation, disorganization and overwhelm can be downright toxic. When your inner critic rages at you for all of the things you aren’t doing, and all of the ways that you don’t measure up, gathering up whatever strength you have to initiate anything seems impossible. You may feel hopeless and stuck. Here’s the good news: you can change your circumstances by shifting your perspective. Instead of repeating what’s wrong with you, or what you can’t do, what would it be like to think about something that you are good at? Something that you like to do? What’s one small action that you could take to begin?
Utilize incentives to get moving
This weekend, when the temperatures soared into the eighties in Massachusetts. I had no choice but to tackle my closets. I needed shorts and tee shirts instead of my turtlenecks and corduroys. Moving my clothes twice a year is one of my all-time dreaded tasks, but it has to get done. 
To make matters more complicated, this year I decided to get rid of stuff that I haven’t worn in the past three years or more. It was torturous. But by Sunday, I had two kitchen garbage bags full of clothes to sell or give away. Sure, I felt good, but it was super tough going at times. I even cried once. How did I manage to accomplish this? By breaking the onerous chore into separate categories: shirts, pants, skirts, sweaters and socks, and doing one type of clothing at a time. By rewarding myself with breaks outside, a long bike ride, phone calls with friends and an iced coffee with a cookie. Incentives were key. I’m sharing this story not to brag, but to make a point. Everybody struggles with doing unpleasant, boring tasks sometimes.
The three types of procrastination
- Perfectionism – “I have to get it right or I won’t do it”
- Avoidance – “I hate doing this thing, it seems impossible, so why bother trying?”
- Productive – “I’m going to do other things that need to get done and feel good but staying away from the bigger thing that I don’t like.”
Procrastination tips for ADHD adults
1. Reflect on your own patterns of procrastination
Take some time to consider the ways that you procrastinate. Do any of the three types of procrastination (perfectionism, avoidance, productive) resonate with you in particular? Does more than one? Which thoughts or beliefs come up for you when you think about why you might procrastinate? When you understand your patterns of procrastination, you’ll feel more empowered and be more effective at reducing your delay tactics.
2. Break big tasks into smaller, more manageable tasks
Procrastination is often related to anxiety and a failure mentality. The best way to combat procrastination is to break things down into small, doable chunks that seem more manageable. Breaking things down into parts makes them more manageable to attempt because you are asking yourself to do a tinier task. 
Think of something that you are putting off. How can you break this down into little parts and which one piece can you start with? If you still can’t initiate, the part isn’t small enough. Instead of putting all of the socks together, what about just folding one shirt? You might think this is ridiculous: that’s okay, it’s just your inner critic trying to thwart you again. Activate your inner coach instead, and tell that voice to take a seat and zip it while you experiment. This trial approach builds your confidence one step at a time because you are performing something instead of avoiding it.
2. Keep the tasks engaging
Keep yourself engaged in a task by adding something fun to it–music, talking with a friend, co-working. It’s tough for unmotivated ADHD brains to get started on something that seems tedious and boring. What can you do to liven things up a bit? Change the order of tasks, take timed movement and snack breaks, switch locations for working, offer yourself an enticing incentive or find an accountability buddy. Create realistic goals–ones that you can actually meet and want to achieve.
Organizing tips for ADHD adults
Organizing tasks can be especially daunting for many adults with ADHD. Where to begin? Creating a system and a routine for dealing with your stuff can help you. Here are three organizing tips for ADHD adults to help get you started:
1. Find or make homes for your belongings
My dad always says, “Everything has its place.” I think this helped him know where to put things so he could remember where they were. When you are trying to cope with that pile of gloves, hats and winter scarves, ask yourself: Where can these things live? Use bins or baskets if putting stuff into drawers doesn’t work.
2. Sort through clutter with labeled piles
When dealing with the mail or sorting through a cluttered closet, mark four bags. One is KEEP, one is TRASH, one is GIVE AWAY and one is MAYBE. Sort through your belongings, and, if you need assistance, ask a supportive friend or family member to be your advisor via FaceTime, Zoom or Skype.
3. Move past the negative self-talk
Lastly, reframe the negative names you call yourself. Replace ‘messy’, ‘sloppy’ or ‘being a slob’ with ‘chaotic or ‘cluttered’ which are much less pejorative. Instead of seeing yourself as someone who is messy, what about reframing yourself as a ‘pile person?’ Maybe you just like your piles. That’s okay, as long as they don’t overwhelm you or lead to hoarding.
Acknowledge your achievements
Motivation benefits from encouragement, so notice your progress! Instead of “why haven’t you finished that?” try acknowledging what you have accomplished with “I’ve gotten started. I threw away the junk mail. Cool.” Lean into your inner coach to keep trying and growing. When you specifically acknowledge your efforts, you nurture your positivity and promote the change you desire. The ideal positivity ratio should be three positives for every negative statement. Is this what you are giving to yourself? Start today by catching yourself doing something you’re proud of, and pivot from disengagement to productivity. Wait, what is that sound? Oh, I think I hear that junk drawer calling your name right now! Good luck, and remember to set up your incentive–your ‘want-to’–first. You got this! 
Read more blog posts:
- 5 Tips to Uplevel Your Spring Cleaning and Decluttering
- Beyond ADHD Pandemic Burnout: How to help your family regroup and find strength
- Perfectionism and ADHD: Why ‘good enough’ is better than perfect
Watch on Dr. Saline’s YouTube channel:
- Daily Routine Tips for ADHD Adults: How to create + keep healthy habits
- ADHD & Productive Procrastination
- Initiating and Completing Tasks with ADHD
Webinars, handouts & more in Dr. Saline’s Store:
https://drsharonsaline.com/product/harness-grit/ https://drsharonsaline.com/product/motivation/
Most kids and adults just want their anxiety 
Most of the time, your teen needs your support in thinking through responses to tricky situations, but not solving them. (Of course, there will be situations when you must intervene, such as cases of bullying, violence, academic failure or risky behaviors.) Kids of anxious parents are more likely to be anxious themselves. Monitor your reactions about your child’s anxiety, and refrain from discussing your concerns in public. React neutrally, regardless of their irritating, frustrating and sometimes scary behaviors. These behaviors are demonstrating how out of control your child or teen feels inside, which is why anxiety exists in the first place.
Many parents who are frustrated with their ADHD children come into my office and complain that “No matter what we do, our child doesn’t change. Nothing works.” As I meet with these families, the heart of the problem usually lies with inconsistency. Sometimes parents can create a plan of action to deal with behaviors and stick with it. Other times, they are improvising moment by moment. Too often, they get stuck and feel defeated. With all of these different scenarios, the ADHD kids, who thrive on predictability, can end up feeling confused and unsure of what is expected of them. How can we change these patterns and create more success? Taking a more predictable, consistent approach to parenting will help improve cooperation and communication. 
Inconsistent parenting reflects mixed messages and unclear rules that evolve over time and unintentionally. It’s not something people decide to do: it frequently occurs because 
Consistent parenting means having the same consequences for the same behaviors over time—again and again and again. They don’t change and can’t be negotiated. It means that you don’t give your ADHD children and teens consequences that you can’t enforce or remember or don’t want to deal with.
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