Often parents receive contradictory or inadequate information about the process, and navigating the maze toward diagnosis and treatment can be perplexing. In particular, the tween and teen years are development stages when trouble with attention, organization, and distractibility come to the forefront. Read three ways you can receive an accurate diagnosis. Read More>>
Do you ever wish that you could pause time, take back something you said, and start over? Would you like to be someone who has quick comebacks in conversations instead of thinking of something good to say 10 minutes later? Read More>>
Students with ADHD want to do well in school, and most of them put a lot of effort into their work. But at the same time, they must contend with issues around focus, organization, distractibility, impulse control and time management, and their academic workload. So let’s take a step back and see how you can prepare your response to a disappointing report card and a disappointed child. Read More>> 
Do you dismiss a compliment or attribute success at your work to luck instead of your intelligence, creativity, or effort? Unfortunately, many adults (and kids) with ADHD have trouble accepting positive feedback about themselves. Years of hearing about their deficiencies or experiencing challenges related to having a neurodivergent brain lead many folks with ADHD to walk around with a persistent feeling that they are just not good enough. Perhaps you feel like an imposter. You wonder if you genuinely deserve validation or acknowledgment when good things happen. If these statements are factual, you probably struggle with imposter syndrome.
Imposter syndrome reflects feeling like a fraud or a phony. It comes from a sense of insecurity in your awareness or hovering just below the surface. Imposter syndrome doesn’t occur overnight. Instead, it takes years of receiving criticism and experiencing judgments for somebody to develop a core sense of deficiency. Based on evaluations, exclusion, or hostility from others as you mature, this deficiency lies at the heart of imposter syndrome. People with ADHD and without can suffer from it. This insecurity fosters pervasive self-doubt that you don’t deserve any accolades that you receive. Instead, you deem other people more worthy because of their accomplishments, confidence, or appearance. Imposter 
syndrome is directly related to perfectionism. Since you are not perfect and can never achieve perfection, then you are fundamentally flawed. Sadly, no success seems to lessen this wound for so many folks. Many neurodivergent teens and adults who have frequently been judged unfavorably against neurotypical standards have internalized these opinions. Despite all efforts to the contrary and any admirable achievements, you may still believe they are true. Imposter syndrome is the domain of your inner critic. It’s the voice spews negativity about simply being an outside-the-box thinker, an imperfectly perfect human like the rest of us. But this voice adds a toxic layer of insecurity: you walk around anxious that someone will discover the incompetent, foolish person you think you 
indeed are. You can’t assimilate the accolades your receive, no matter how much you deserve them. In addition, many people with imposter syndrome also live with a low (or overt) level of depression. There’s a mix of persistent anxiety about discovering your dark secret and hopelessness that you can never entirely change for the better. Even though its origins can make sense, given your personal history, it’s still a brutal way to treat yourself.
I want to offer you a different approach that allows you to value and absorb affirming things about yourself. You do not have to live with imposter syndrome. Yes, lowering the volume of these harsh thoughts and deeply ingrained false beliefs can be very challenging. You may be so accustomed to second-guessing yourself that it seems counterintuitive to act differently. But what if you allowed yourself to make mistakes and be successful simultaneously? Sometimes you hit a home run, and sometimes, you swing and miss. The average baseball player strikes out at the plate two out of three times. Trying, struggling, regrouping, and trying again doesn’t mean that you’ve failed or other people are better than you are. It’s what living is all about: manifesting a growth mindset. Imposter syndrome intensifies your vulnerabilities while denying you the satisfaction derived from effort and engagement. You have strengths and challenges like everybody else. The problem is the struggle to hold onto your successes long enough to believe in your abilities and nurture a sense of inner pride. Instead, the imposter monster quickly grabs them and tosses them away.
When you acknowledge your wins, regardless of size or importance, you are laying Kryptonite at the feet of the imposter beast. When you pay equal if not more attention to things that go well, something that you enjoy, and things that you are good at, you weaken this pattern even more. It’s about shifting your perspective from what’s wrong and not enough about you to celebrate what is positive and good enough. Accept it if someone pays you a compliment–don’t deflect it. Say “thank you.” Please take it in and hold it like the precious gift that it is. If you tell a colleague that you want to improve your timeliness and you show up to a meeting on time, receive their high-five of support with a grin. When your partner appreciates that you went grocery shopping and put away all the food, refrain from minimizing and accepting their acknowledgment.
Start to counter the inner critic’s voice by strengthening your inner ally. This coach is the one who encourages you, who reminds you of your value as a person, and who sees the good in things you do. Strengthen this ally by paying attention to what is working. At the end of each day, with your partner at dinner, via text with a friend, or in your journal, acknowledge three things that went well. These can be as simple as “I made a great cup of coffee this morning” to “My boss told me that she loved my presentation.” Fill up the well inside of you with these statements instead of the self-critical, judgmental ones. You’ll be building self-confidence and self-worth instead of fueling anxiety.
Lastly, I cannot emphasize the importance of validating traits about yourself that are separate from what you do–traits about who you are: warm, funny, intelligent, spontaneous, generous, and kind. People with ADHD struggle to perform effectively in areas related to executive functioning deficits like emotional regulation, organization, time management, and focus. But you also excel at activities and interests you love. Both are true simultaneously. There’s a lot right with you so take the time to notice, honor and hold onto those things today. This is how you will reduce imposter syndrome.
Please become a member of my newsletter community. You can find support and resources and connect with a group that understands your questions and needs. Click here Follow me on social media: YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Invite Me to Speak | Join A Group | Newsletter | Read my blog 
Sign-up for my newsletter today and receive 10% off!
Daily routines fall apart for a host of reasons related to ADHD – from executive dysfunction and perfectionism to “now” and “not now” thinking. Follow this guide to help you create a routine you’ll stick to. Read More>>
Sometimes I get a bit blue around New Year’s Day. With everybody making promises about things they want to change or do differently, I feel pressured instead of motivated, pressured to make another resolution about fixing some aspect of my life that could go better. Then I overfocus on my mistakes this year, on things that didn’t go well at work, in my family, or how I tried something new with mixed results. With all of these thoughts swirling in my head, I feel anything but excited about what’s ahead in the coming months. Ugh. Do you do this? Frankly, let’s do away with resolutions and focus instead on the wins from the year that just passed.
Wouldn’t it be lovely to gather around the table and share one achievement, along with our thoughts about how to further these? Take a minute now and reflect on something that happened in 2022 that you feel good about. It can be small, or it can be big. Size or impact doesn’t matter. What’s essential is shifting your mindset from fixing what’s wrong to enhance what’s going well. 
I’ve always loved the gospel spiritual “This little light of mine.” When my children were young, we sang it at holidays or birthdays. We loved the message and the melody. Lately, this song has been buzzing through my head as a theme song for my clients. It has helped me assist them in moving beyond previous limitations (set by others or themselves) toward taking appropriate risks for genuine participation in relationships, work events, and social situations.
When you grow up with a neurodivergent brain, whether it’s having ADHD, a learning disability, autism, being twice-exceptional, or dealing with mental health issues, other people may have blown out your light. Not once, not twice, but multiple times. This year, my call to action is to fire your light up and shine it, no matter what other people say or do.
It can be tough to shine your light in the face of criticism, misunderstanding, or rejection. It can also be challenging to try living as an outside-the-box thinker in a world marked by categories, labels, and judgments. Shining your light isn’t about ignoring what’s happening around you but instead accepting yourself, warts and all, and owning what is unique and brilliant about who you are. Yes, we all make mistakes; that’s how human beings learn. These experiences can also be painful, embarrassing, and discouraging, but they are opportunities to grow, practice flexibility, and change.
Learning can be challenging to do and a struggle for many people. But it will also allow you to reduce the volume on the negative internal voices in their heads and raise the dimmer on the light switch to project something unique and positive about themselves instead. Practicing self-compassion, being mindful about your choices, acting with accountability rather than shame, and talking to yourself the way you would speak to a third-grader with a skinned knee–will lead to more personal happiness and greater self-esteem. In 2023, I ask that we honor our full selves’ wonderful, complicated nature. Reflect on one behavior or characteristic about yourself that you enjoy and that seems to make others happy too. This is what we can share brightly with others. I encourage you to stop beating yourself up for what you aren’t and start empowering yourself for who you are. When you foster a consistent connection with this part of yourself, the foibles seem smaller and less significant because they are. You are more than whatever a resolution aims to change. 
This upcoming year, you may live with ease, safety, and health. May you treat yourself and others with kindness and care. Happy 2023! P.S. After I wrote this blog, a friend sent me this poem by Donna Ashworth that she saw on Facebook. It was so synchronistic that I had to share it with you.
Why do we start a new year with promises to improve? Who began this tradition of never-ending pressure? The end of a year should be filled with congratulation for all we survived. And I say a new year should start with promises to be kinder to ourselves, to understand better just how much we bear, as humans on this exhausting treadmill of life. And if we are to promise more, let’s pledge to rest, before our bodies force us. Let’s pledge to stop, and drink in life as it happens. Let’s pledge to strip away a layer of perfection to reveal the flawed and wondrous humanity we truly are inside. Why start another year, gifted to us on this earth, with demands on our already over-strained humanity. When we could be learning to accept, that we were always supposed to be imperfect. And that is where the beauty lives, actually. And if we can only find that beauty, we would also find peace. I wish you peace in 2023. Everything else is all just a part of it. Let it be so. Donna Ashworth
Please become a member of my newsletter community. You can find support and resources and connect with a group that understands your questions and needs. Click here Follow me on social media: YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Invite Me to Speak | Join A Group | Newsletter | Read my blog
Sign-up for my newsletter today and receive 10% off!
Post-traumatic growth happens when individuals resist being debilitated by trauma and lean into their strengths. Follow these steps to overcome adversity. Follow these steps to foster Post Traumatic Growth. Read More>>
Do you ever face a task you know you need to do, but feel too frozen to begin? That’s called task paralysis. Fortunately, there are some proven strategies to reduce ADHD task paralysis so that you can feel more productive, more effective, and more regulated. Read More>>
New research points to a link between use of social media and mental health risks among adolescents, who generally want to be accepted, popular, and well-liked. When teens with ADHD fall into the “compare and despair” trap, it can lead to lower self-esteem and frequent negativity. These tips can help boost confidence. Read More>>
What better way to kick off the holiday season than by reflecting on what we are thankful for? Learn how to practice gratitude to counteract those troubling emotions. Read More>>
Welcoming clients of all races, faiths, cultures, identities, & orientations.
Dr. Sharon Saline, Psy. D.
43 Center Street, Suite 303
Northampton, MA 01060
Phone: (413) 586-6900
Fax: (413) 584-0530
info@drsharonsaline.com
©2025 Dr. Sharon Saline • SEO by Crownsville Media, LLC • Developed by Artefact Design, Inc.